Today Is Not My Birthday—Let's Have Cake

I think the Mad Hatter and the March Hare had a true thing going when they were sloshing deep in the tea at one of their famous un-birthday celebrations. Take it from someone who has survived 67,5 disappointing birthdays: Sometimes, your birthday just isn't the best day to have a party.

My experience is that it's best to have parties (and Mint Juleps) whenever it suits me? There isn't anything more jubilant in turning 50 than in turning "50 and 112 days". My joints, I am sure, will ache just the same.

Sometimes, it seems as if we feel so guilty about having fun that we can not help but over fixate on "the big anniversaries". We pile up all the expectations, candy bars, and enjoyment inside our grubby fun-drawer of unmentionables and never let it out. Except for when the right suitor...or anniversary comes along. Then we open the drawer and—much to our horror and disappointment—realize that the moths got in and our favourite silky things are not just unmentionable but also unwearable.

We don't air our dirty laundry, but we also don't air our joy and delight. And yet, both are practices very much worth having. Both for yourself, and as a kindness to others.

As the mother of a teenage boy, I can tell you EXACTLY what happens when you do not air out the dirty laundry.

I think joy works the same way, even though it is much more pleasant than my son's sweatpants. If you don't let it out, it just gets smelly and rots. I am not saying that cheerfully flaunting your joy and delight every day except Sunday will fix all your problems, but I am sure that your closet full of despair could do without the extra joy rotting in the corner.

So, take a page out of Alice in Wonderland and celebrate. Without any special reason whatsoever. Just because.

At first, it will feel strange. You will feel a bit guilty. You know, like you feel when you take a bubble bath in the middle of the day. It feels SO good, but somehow, you still have this nagging feeling that things should not smell of rose bubbles and make your skin so soft before 7 PM. Certainly not while you still have other things to do.

You will also get some weird looks from other people the first couple of times you casually suggest an unwarranted celebration in the middle of February. They will keep asking you what the occasion is and then harrumph a little when you blithely tell them that there is none.

After a few of these baseless celebrations, though, the people around you will get used to it. At worst, they'll think that you are a bit eccentric (my brother still shakes his head in awe every time he has a direct encounter with my "let's just celebrate for no reason"-thing), at best, they'll join you and you'll save them many, many sour-faced birthdays.

Either way, there will be more Mint Juleps in your life. Definitely a win win.